Capers Involving Chocolate

Every now and then, I get emails from friends sharing their latest food adventures: it could be about the weird-looking thing they ate over the weekend, or the giant slabs of steaks they grilled, or a wonderful meal at a restaurant, or their latest dessert discovery. They know I appreciate stories like that. Sometimes the letters are really precious and too funny to keep to myself, sometimes they’re works of journalistic genius, and sometimes, they’re just plain weird (but I still love them all).

This is an actual letter from a friend.

Here are my latest Capers involving chocolate:

1. I stole a bar of fancy chocolate from Trader Joes last week. I took a bite of it and didn’t like it so I threw it away a few feet outside the store. I was glad that I stole it instead of paying for it.

2. I’ve been seeing this cutie lately. Last Sunday, I randomly picked up one of those $5 chocolate bars from Whole Foods for her. I don’t remember the brand but the flavor was blueberries and dark chocolate. When I gave her this thing out of the blue (cause I knew she, like all women, love chocolate) she totally lit up. With each bite she took I could see some uncontrollable, ravenous lust come over her for the chocolate bar. It was like she was possessed. I was skerd of her, jealous of the candy bar, and delighted that I pleased her at the same time.

If you publish this on your blog, please conceal my identity.

***

My reply:

You have no idea how emails just revolving around chocolate brighten my day. Thank you.

Who is this new cutie?? Good job on the Whole Foods chocolate. I’m proud of you. If you want to impress her even more, I recommend LA Burdick in Harvard Square. Seriously, like for a special occasion (because these babies are expensive), it would be a great accompaniment to a gift. Or if you’re rolling in money and can afford $35 for a little box, just go for it. They also have awesome hot chocolate.

Please don’t ever steal chocolate again. Also, please don’t ever, ever, ever throw away fancy chocolate from Trader Joe’s. Next time you can throw it in my mouth.

***

Do you receive/send emails about food too?

   

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